Lottie,
Welcome to the forums! I think this is a fantastic topic you are going over! I'm obviously not a woman, but I look forward to seeing what others have to say!! I'll be sending people to this topic! Let me know if there is anything else I can do to help!
~Matt
Well, I'm new here so if I step on a few landmines, please let me know guys.
I identify as gay woman. For some reason lesbian doesn't roll off my tongue well. I'm 36 and I feel we come out more than once in life. I had a lot of medical issues to really think about the Outing process. At about 13 I first came out to my brother. He just said "I knew it." We had a good connection like that. Though, I always wanted to ask him how.
My mother took it differently. She didn't know. She said I didn't have the "signs". (I look straight and ten times younger than my age, which didn't help) but one day we were driving in DC (US) and there are a lot of people in the LGBTQ community in the mix with straight. Unlike VA, where I live, DC is the hot spot for LGBTQ support, interaction, and community. We're driving and we see a stereotypic transvestite with heels and makeup. Then my mother says, "there goes one of your people." My people? I actually didn't go out of the car and talk to the woman. It was all on assumptions on how the person dressed and walked. I won't forget that statement.
At school, mostly high school (I went to four), coming out was a bit easier because I didn't have many friends. No one can mistake my face when I see someone attractive walk by. I hear things like "I think she's gay" or if they knew what the world lesbian was, I think that was said out loud a couple of times.
Fast forward, what, ten years or so and my father took it well but he wanted me to carry on our last name by my supposed husband. My lesbian aunt is the only one I could really talk to.
My second coming out (after the high school crush, I forgot to mention) in college I had a huge huge huge crush on this woman way on the other side of the world in Chile. This is when internet and chat rooms started to popularize. I came out again to myself in a more physical way when I had my first girlfriend.
I went to my first LGBTQ support group last year and came out again spiritually. Then I really GOT IT when I went to PRIDE last month June. Now I want to know everything about the LGBTQ community, history, equality (which has always been a value now I have the history to identity with).
I mean, I'm a fluster of colors. I wouldn't say queer but that has its own story. I'd say coming out is never a one time experience. The only few times I felt external opposition was the looks and comments people made. I always have internal oppositions because I live in a catholic environment, catholic owned home, catholic neighborhood, in a catholic town, christian state, in a christian nation. I was only Catholic four years out of my adult life. Loved every bit of it but never knew the things I value and identity as me are the things they want to cure.
So, I came out again to spirituality. Pulled myself away from what harmed my spirit and just be free me as a gay woman in the LGBTQ community. I look forward to seeing another PRIDE Equality March next year. The coming out day was nice in itself last year. Went to Gallaudet as a hearing ally to the LGBTQ Deaf community (going into ASL Interpreting) and "listened" to each student's' experiences as LGBTQ students.
That was a coming out experience. Finding ways to support.
In general, though, my coming out experiences wasn't that bad excluding the religious threshold. But I've held hands in public. I've kissed in public. Waved my flag. and Said I'm proud.
So, that's my experience.
You can chop it up. I used to be a journalist; so, I hope everything goes well in your articles and paper.
I am the worst spelling and grammar person; so, if I miss a word here are there, it's because I didn't see the blue or red line. I edit often.
