Post by silverbloodvrs on Jan 20, 2015 16:30:20 GMT -6
Okay, so i say this now before anything, the pronouns im using are for current state, the change of pronouns has not been decided just yet.
So... about a week and half ago my Boyfriend came out as being interested in hormones. i ended up crying we briefly discussed and then it was dropped. The other day he officially said that he thinks hes transgendered (MTF) and really wants to use hormones. We have been together for about 2 years and friends for a little more, and i had always known he was very feminine but he still had masculine moments. like wanting to grow a beard, wanting to be super muscular, wanting some enlarged male body parts. So this comming out blind sided me.
Im Bi-gendered myself, so i normally would have no issue, a majority of my friends are genderfluid or bigendered. and i had a friend who i helped come out as transgendered just a few years ago. However, im terrified. every time the subject is brought up i start to cry. i try not to but i cant help it. i even cried on his chest last night for about an hour to the point that my nose was so stuffed i couldnt breathe.
My best friend thinks its because im not good with change, using our friend previously mentioned as reference. but i explained to her i had no issue with that. and i just cant understand it. Its scaring me really bad, and hes going about it so fast. And im trying to be supportive.
i brought him some of my clothing that i dont normally wear, i brought him an old bra that he can use. i even brought over some jewelry and nail polish, my long wig, ect. the whole nine yards. i even painted his nails and did his makeup for him.
And that entire time i was fine.
but then i think about our memories and i start crying, i think about the future i start crying. he starts talking about wanting to do " girl things " i start crying. And other times i find myself snapping at him when he mentions anything. and i dont mean to. i keep assuring him that i want to support him and ill do whatever i have to. and that i want him to be happy. but im scared and i keep breaking down crying, and i dont want him to feel bad that im so upset and i just dont know what to do... and i really need someones advice.
does it get easier? is this just part of the whole process? Am i stupid for trying to stay with him?
His sister wants him to see a therapist to get all the information and stuff. and Some part of me wishes that hell turn out to be bi-gendered, or gender fluid. and i know thats a terrible thing to say. and even to think. but i know how to handle that and all but i just feel really sad and scared all the time. please give me some guidance.
So... about a week and half ago my Boyfriend came out as being interested in hormones. i ended up crying we briefly discussed and then it was dropped. The other day he officially said that he thinks hes transgendered (MTF) and really wants to use hormones. We have been together for about 2 years and friends for a little more, and i had always known he was very feminine but he still had masculine moments. like wanting to grow a beard, wanting to be super muscular, wanting some enlarged male body parts. So this comming out blind sided me.
Im Bi-gendered myself, so i normally would have no issue, a majority of my friends are genderfluid or bigendered. and i had a friend who i helped come out as transgendered just a few years ago. However, im terrified. every time the subject is brought up i start to cry. i try not to but i cant help it. i even cried on his chest last night for about an hour to the point that my nose was so stuffed i couldnt breathe.
My best friend thinks its because im not good with change, using our friend previously mentioned as reference. but i explained to her i had no issue with that. and i just cant understand it. Its scaring me really bad, and hes going about it so fast. And im trying to be supportive.
i brought him some of my clothing that i dont normally wear, i brought him an old bra that he can use. i even brought over some jewelry and nail polish, my long wig, ect. the whole nine yards. i even painted his nails and did his makeup for him.
And that entire time i was fine.
but then i think about our memories and i start crying, i think about the future i start crying. he starts talking about wanting to do " girl things " i start crying. And other times i find myself snapping at him when he mentions anything. and i dont mean to. i keep assuring him that i want to support him and ill do whatever i have to. and that i want him to be happy. but im scared and i keep breaking down crying, and i dont want him to feel bad that im so upset and i just dont know what to do... and i really need someones advice.
does it get easier? is this just part of the whole process? Am i stupid for trying to stay with him?
His sister wants him to see a therapist to get all the information and stuff. and Some part of me wishes that hell turn out to be bi-gendered, or gender fluid. and i know thats a terrible thing to say. and even to think. but i know how to handle that and all but i just feel really sad and scared all the time. please give me some guidance.
