Post by Confused on Aug 6, 2016 4:21:44 GMT -6
Im really confused about my gender identity, Im 16 bio- Female and for the last few months iv been really confused to the point that im thinking about it 24/7. I think i might be Trans. I want to be a boy and be seen as one but iv always known myself as female, iv had the passing thought a few times over the years like am i trans but then i just dismissed it and have the occasional thought of dam i wish i was a dude. but this time it came into my head it won't leave no matter what i do.
I thought of it and then part of me went dude i think you are but another part went you cant be a boy your a girl you've been a girl for 16 years of your life but the more i think about it the more confused and more sure i get i look back at my childhood and things that i didn't think were connected are piecing together but i cant shake the thought of i cant be but i cant find any reasons why it must be false besides iv always been a girl and lots for why i think i might be trans though the reasons are
I don't like my boobs sometimes im so disgusted i cant touch them without feeling nauseous i get jealous when i see all the guys with their flat chests and skinny frames and flat stomachs and the clothes they get to wear, I feel jealous of FTMs and i relate to males in tv and book and stuff not females and i want to be like them almost as if i want to be them and i wear a sports bra to flatten my chest and i have bought a binder and wear it whenever i can it makes me happy and i got my hair cut short and it just fits me much better like i feel happier and more myself and i cant stand when people call me lady or woman or call me pretty and when i get mistaken for a guy i feel great and i hate dresses and skirts and 'girly' things since i have started thinking i might be trans my dysphoria has gotten so much worse i didn't used to get genital dysphoria but now i do coz i realise that i will never actually be fully male no matter who much i try or want it i will never be 100% biologically male and i used to be fine with people saying she/ her but now it just pisses me off but im only realising this now. every time i start to think of myself as male or think maybe i am trans and maybe i am a boy i think about my body and the way people see me and i realise that im a girl, i feel like im just faking it in some way like i have somehow convinced myself to feel a certain way.
Sorry this is such a mess im just really confused. i want to accept it but i cant its gotten to the point where i just want it to go away i just want to stop feeling like this but a part of me is holding onto it and i think i would be disappointed if i wasn't trans, i have been considering telling my mum and coming out (i have actually planned it out) so i can wear the boy uniform at school but what if im wrong what if im not trans.
sorry this is so long
why cant i accept it
I thought of it and then part of me went dude i think you are but another part went you cant be a boy your a girl you've been a girl for 16 years of your life but the more i think about it the more confused and more sure i get i look back at my childhood and things that i didn't think were connected are piecing together but i cant shake the thought of i cant be but i cant find any reasons why it must be false besides iv always been a girl and lots for why i think i might be trans though the reasons are
I don't like my boobs sometimes im so disgusted i cant touch them without feeling nauseous i get jealous when i see all the guys with their flat chests and skinny frames and flat stomachs and the clothes they get to wear, I feel jealous of FTMs and i relate to males in tv and book and stuff not females and i want to be like them almost as if i want to be them and i wear a sports bra to flatten my chest and i have bought a binder and wear it whenever i can it makes me happy and i got my hair cut short and it just fits me much better like i feel happier and more myself and i cant stand when people call me lady or woman or call me pretty and when i get mistaken for a guy i feel great and i hate dresses and skirts and 'girly' things since i have started thinking i might be trans my dysphoria has gotten so much worse i didn't used to get genital dysphoria but now i do coz i realise that i will never actually be fully male no matter who much i try or want it i will never be 100% biologically male and i used to be fine with people saying she/ her but now it just pisses me off but im only realising this now. every time i start to think of myself as male or think maybe i am trans and maybe i am a boy i think about my body and the way people see me and i realise that im a girl, i feel like im just faking it in some way like i have somehow convinced myself to feel a certain way.
Sorry this is such a mess im just really confused. i want to accept it but i cant its gotten to the point where i just want it to go away i just want to stop feeling like this but a part of me is holding onto it and i think i would be disappointed if i wasn't trans, i have been considering telling my mum and coming out (i have actually planned it out) so i can wear the boy uniform at school but what if im wrong what if im not trans.
sorry this is so long
why cant i accept it
